At a services halfway up the A1 somewhere near Doncaster, there was an advert on the men’s toilet wall that read;
“1 in 5 men suffer with premature ejaculation.”
Surely it’s the women who suffer isn’t it?
Though I wouldn’t know…
…I’m normally asleep by then.
1- the reproachful stare.
B – numbered lists.
3 – writing ’10 things women do better than men’ lists.
4 – talking about non practical things on the phone.
5 – talking about practical things on the phone.
6 – at only having one organ to think with.
7 – performing everyday tasks without expecting a gold star or sexual favours.
8 – sexual favours.
9 – remembering what someone was wearing at a specific event 10 years ago.
10 – everything else not mentioned above.
11 – knowing when to stop.
Often, female friends ask me for a male perspective.
I usually burp, ignore everything they say then talk about football.
Snogging – never got one because of a blog (though a ‘like’ is almost as good.)
Flogging – few of us will ever make money at this (and there are a lot of dead horses on here too.)
Jogging – run through somebody’s mind all day by mentioning the muppet theme song so they can’t get it out of their head.
Clogging – hoping to clog up the Internet with our overbrimming verbosity.
Logging – a diary that anyone can read and misinterpret.
Dogging – a dodgy sexual practice here in England that I would neither condone or prohibit (and is very difficult in a mini – car or skirt – so I have heard!)
Hogging – filling everyone else’s inbox with rhyming trivial lists.
I’m out. Anymore?
Though there are exceptions; successful women and poor men are skinny.
There is a saying that states there is more difference within the sexes than between them. There is another book that would argue we are from different planets.
Here are a few other thoughts offered up to me by my Dad
Women will always be right and men will never understand why they are wrong.
Always listen to what they say – because at some point they will say ‘you haven’t been listening to a word I say!’ then you can regurgitate said preamble and carry on reading your paper smugly.
If you are walking a small group of girls home after a party or club, always make sure the pretty one lives furthest away.